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Where Do I Start?

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If you've never adopted before, it can be hard to know where to start. Because the process can seem so overwhelming, especially those who aren't as experienced with the adoption process as others, it's important to start with the basics and work your way up from there. Before you can even begin the process, you must first understand how the process works and what you need, want, and expect from this experience. This includes knowing the type of adoption you want, how to interact with biological parents and adoption professionals, and the adoption eligibility requirements.

This section is the perfect place to start. Throughout these pages, you'll learn who can adopt and if you're eligible. If you're choosing domestic adoption--meaning within the United States--it's important to know that each state has different laws, guidelines, and requirements for adoption eligibility. If you're going to adopt a child from a different state than your own, you will have to satisfy both states' requirements and expectations.

If you choose international adoption--meaning outside the United States--each country has very specific guidelines and requirements for adoptive parents, including age limits, years of being married, ethnicity and religion, and even income. It all comes down to proper, extensive research, no matter what you decide. Because of the emotional, mental, and financial toll adoption can bring, make sure you know the country's requirements before you begin. It can save you a lot of heartache in the long run.

In order to fully understand the adoption process, you must first learn the common and accepted words and terms. This will not only give you a better understanding during legal adoption proceedings, but it help you better navigate social interactions within the adoption community. Because adoption can be such an emotional and sensitive topic, it will only benefit you and your journey to know which terms are acceptable and which ones are offensive to any given side of the adoption triad. Sensitivity and empathetic awareness are two essential traits to any productive, effective, and life-long adoption relationship.

After all is said and done, you'll need to decide if adoption is really right for you. It's not for everyone, and that doesn't make you a bad person. If you decide that it's not for you, that's perfectly fine. You can then move forward with confidence knowing you've explored your options and you made an intelligent, informed decision. However, if you feel adoption is still a viable option for your life and your family, spend a little time taking the "Are You Ready?" assessment. This will give you a little more insight into your own needs and expectations for adoption. Once you're aware of that, you can then proceed with the adoption process in confidence.


  1. Getting Started with Adoption
  2. How Many People Choose Adoption?
  3. Is Adoption Right for You?
  4. Adoption Self-Assessment Quiz
  5. Which Children Are Available for Adoption?
  6. Sibling Groups
  7. Who Can Adopt?
  8. Qualification Requirements for Adopting Parents
  9. Your Adoption Options
  10. Agency Adoption
  11. Private (or Independent) Adoption
  12. Options in Independent Adoption
  13. Adoption Facilitators
  14. International Adoption
  15. Foster Adoption
  16. Stepparent Adoption
  17. Transracial Adoption
  18. Special Needs Adoption
  19. Military Adoption
  20. Making an Adoption Plan
  21. Selecting an Adoption Professional
  22. Getting an Adoption Homestudy
  23. Adoption Costs
  24. Why Do Costs Seem So High?
  25. Help Handling the Costs of Adoption
  26. The Adoption Tax Credit
  27. Adoption Subsidies
  28. Employer Adoption Benefits
  29. Networking & Networking Tools
  30. Legal Issues in Adoption
  31. Evaluating Adoption Risks
  32. Open Adoption
  33. Breastfeeding the Adopted Child
  34. Coping With the Wait
  35. Glossary of Terms
  36. Recommended Reading
  37. Conclusion
Visitor Comments (6)
Adding your comments contributes to the adoption community. Please keep all comments on topic and civil. Visitors are invited to comment and vote for or flag comments based on appropriateness and helpfulness. All comments must adhere to our commenting rules and are subject to moderation.
Reagan - 4 weeks ago
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one day im going to adopt i have want to do this since i knew about kids with no mother this is a letter to my special child. My Special One, Long ago when i was just a little girl I heard about these kids who didnt have a mom and dad anymore. At this moment at such a young age i dreamed of you. I knew i would one day find you. You are not apart of me when dna is involved but you have been apart of my dreams and my future before I was old enough to write. I dont know you yet. I see someone who is so special. They love to be outside and cant wait to meet me either. I pray everyday for you. And will teach you to pray with me one day. Your going to have a brother named Raiden and hopefully a sister. A mother who loves you and has always been your mother just have to find you. You are not here with me yet i dont know if your here on earth yet. I had to let you know i am thinking of you. I know you cant hear me but i hope you feel this letter. And find comfort in this. You have a family and #1
smith - 3 months ago
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Hello, My name is Tammy and my wonderful husband's name is Shane. We've been married just over 10 years. We've been ttc for the past 9 years with no luck. We've now decided that adoption is the right option for us. We've been looking into the process over the past year or so. We're not a wealthy family but we have more than enough love to make up for it. We live in a small town in Ohio, We're actually hoping to do an adoption through the birth parent/parents that way the money spent can be put directly towards things for the child rather than wasted on pricey legal fees eat. So my question is, Where do we start? Who should we contact? Thanks and god bless. #2
Mishel Mercier - 2 months ago
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I am a mother of 2 girls...they grow so fast! We are looking to adopt an infant- 4 years old boy. Not even sure where to start! We have been married for 20 yrs. Would love to share our love with a child again! #3
looking to adoption a little girl - 3 months ago
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Hello .im james an patricia hopkins we looking to adoption a little girl that we can call our own #4
queen badger - 8 months ago
0 1 1
Queen badger in the 60s she put her baby girl up four adoption we want to know where the baby is #5
Khursheed - 3 months ago
0 1 0
I want to be adopted #6
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